November 7, 2007

Pride

Posted in *cringe*, Darth Vaguer, Guilt, Seven Deadlies, The Just a Little Sad, The WTF at 9:28 am by Dagny Taggart

I stumbled across this a little while ago, and mislabeled it “dignity”.  Since then, it’s been nudging me whenever something didn’t portray me in the absolute best light possible.

I love learning new things, but hate doing so in front of people.  This has been a problem in far too many situations – stage fright, it seems, is really little more than the mind’s allergic reaction to humiliation.  Billiards, standard shift cars, eating with chopsticks.  Being in a relationship where you actually let yourself trust and develop expectations.

Now, granted – the penultimate really only involves one witness – your dry cleaner.  That last one, though – there’s a whole host of potential audience members.  Every nosy person who’s ever asked you about your “love life”*, every ex who checks your myspace/friendster/blog (hi!) hoping for signs that your life sucks as much as theirs, and of course, anyone the other person shares their actual intentions with… the peanut gallery is full of possibilities. 

Which is one of the reasons I’m so vague here, sometimes.  No need to invite superfluous audience members. 

So basically, right now, I’m in the mood to ignore anything I might have recently said on the subject and resume my militant breeziness.  Pride and I are so in a fight, and right now, the pride’s winning.  I’m just going to go with it.  Knee-jerk reaction, indeed.

*For some reason, whenever Dr. Taggart utters this phrase, I am possessed by an absurdly strong compulsion to gouge out my eyes.  I wonder why that is…
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3 Comments »

  1. I-66 said,

    I swear my eyeroll is audible when my mother medles in my love life.

  2. You should have an annotated version of your blog for those of us who don’t understand cryptic references 😉

    P.S. Footnotes are better than endnotes.

  3. I-66: Audible eye rolls? Hm. Thankfully, she doesn’t meddle, she just pries. If I weren’t terrified of what she’d come up with (envisioning endless stream of CPAs from her graduate classes), I might tell her to stop asking unless she was willing to help. From 250 miles away, it wouldn’t be so bad. Right? Right? 😮

    HIN: I’ll look into the footnote issue, but… when there isn’t a “page”, per se… what’s the difference?

    As if I’d make things that easy for everyone… come now. Who doesn’t love a challenge? 😀


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