April 8, 2009

They say she’s the Same

Posted in Darth Vaguer, Past, The Happy, The Just a Little Sad, The Why at 9:02 am by Dagny Taggart

…but she isn’t the same.

When I was a wee lass, living at home with my parents, we had a few tv shows we could all agree on.  Jeopardy!, of course.  I found Wheel of Fortune annoying.  When I was very young (three-ish?), I was allowed to watch Murder, She Wrote if I’d taken my bath by the time the theme song started.  And then, there was Roseanne.

In one episode, fairly late in the show’s running, DJ is forty or so, and rocks back and forth saying, “They say she’s the same, but she isn’t the same.”  The show was, amusingly, self-mocking the fact that the Becky character had been played by two separate actresses who’d each taken several consecutive turns at the role.

I thought of this, because I was thinking about the different ways a person can be regarded.  In one particular instance, I think that the world would genuinely be a better place if a certain person didn’t exist.  I also know a few people who would strongly disagree with that statement.

In another, a person I’ve known for a couple years was reviled by someone who’s known him much longer.  And yet, not a single statement about his character meshed with what I’ve come to know – it was so far off as to warrant a Jekyll-Hyde analogy.  And perhaps that was the person they’d known – but it’s not the person I know – who is fundamentally kind, who has integrity, intelligence, and a desire to be good at things, including life generally.

And finally, I was thinking about something out of yesterday’s comments.  I’ve been accused of being a horrible person, and I’ve also been accused of being one of the nicest people a person knows.  Personally, I’m pretty sure the truth is somewhere in the middle, though I try to keep it more on the “nice” end of the spectrum.  And that’s a constant work in progress – so the me people know now, well…  she’s not the same as the me people knew last month.

Only a few people get to know if the change is for better or worse, or possibly both.



  1. Laura said,

    You are, without a doubt, one of the nicest people I know. 🙂

  2. Laura: Thanks! That’s good to hear. 🙂

  3. Brian said,

    You are generally kickass. I’m fairly sure this can be verified empirically. Smart, funny, thoughtful. Kickass.

    If you even stop to ask the question, then you aren’t a horrible person. I would think those two conditions are kind of mutually exclusive.

    As is horrible person/kickass. So, obviously, you’re safe. 😉

  4. sour said,

    i stopped watching roseanne as soon as they got that new becky. she just wasn’t the same.
    *rocks back and forth*

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