March 15, 2010
Joey, have you ever been in… in a Turkish prison?
Mr. Graves, you will be missed.
Some friends of mine throw a party about this time every year. It’s St. Patrick’s Day themed, though it rarely falls on the 17th, as my friends are the practical sort who would rather give themselves a Sunday of recovery, rather than quibble about dates. These are friends I’ve known for well over a decade, and the group that shows up has a fair amount of history with one another.
Including me, and the sociopath who tried to apologize.
You see, I’ve known this guy for, again, roughly 14 years. One of my earliest, and most vivid memories of him, involves an evening when he asked me to help at a rush event, then proceeded to make reprehensible statements of a sexual nature about my best friend and roommate – who was underage at the time, incidentally.
Oh – and when I relayed that story both to the girl in question, as well as to some of my other female friends who socialized with that group, he acted as though I were in the wrong, for talking about a conversation that had happened at a rush event. As though I were a disappointment for not agreeing to keep his behavior under wraps.
He was apologizing for a completely different incident, though. One where he, despite knowing full well that I was not amenable to any such pairing, told a mutual friend of ours that I was interested in dating him, and that he should ask me out. Because I’d been pretty clear about my lack of interest, it was obvious to me that this guy enjoyed putting people into awkward situations, and didn’t particularly care about the consequences for anyone but himself.
So when he pulled me aside and offered a glib apology, I smiled and congratulated him on his lovely family, and didn’t accept a word of his contrition.
Because I am not some vapid, simpering idiot, or neglected preschooler, to be so easily manipulated with a practiced smile and diplomatic pablum.
I hope he ends up in a Turkish prison.