March 24, 2010

Smile, and the rest will follow

Posted in I need a helmet, Project: Fail, The Ouch, The Round at 6:46 am by Dagny Taggart

You know how they say that if you smile, the rest of your outlook, and subsequently your day, will become positive as a result?

Well, my body, fresh from a session of training, is NOT smiling.  My body is, to put it bluntly, 97% mush.  The other 3%, located in the general vicinity of the bottom of my left calf, is screaming bloody murder and spasming in a comically randomized fashion.

Thus, 97% of my brain is mush, but for the 3% that (a) registers the pain in my calf, and (b) maintains basic bodily functions such as breathing, and fantasizing about caffeine and sleep.  And chopping down the tree whose virtues I have extolled several times thus far, as I have discovered that it is a maple tree and guess who developed a new allergy to maple this season?

Except that as soon as I think about moving my arms like that, my calf spasms again, as if to say “Learn your lesson, you silly girl!”  And then my brain twitches, as if to say, “Meh.  I am too tired and mushy to learn.”

So, yeah.  There’s not going to be a whole heck of a lot of smiling positivity today.  I think the best we can hope for is ploddingly neutral.  Who’s with me?!?


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